How do I handle my friend and how shes acting?

Audrey

Posts: 1

« on: October 21, 2008, 04:28:39 PM »

Ok, well, me and my friend have been friends since 2nd grade. But now that the new school year started she?s acted so different. She?s doing her hair and putting on makeup and getting really pretty. (I know there is nothing wrong with that at all.) But, than she sometimes acts too good for everyone. She makes games with her other friend to try and get me mad, they think it's funny when they mess with me.

She also wants me too change my Halloween costume just because it's somewhat similar to hers. (Even though I?ve already ordered the whole thing.) I know some of you are thinking "Just leave her!" but, it's not that easy we have 3 classes together! We have to sit next to each other in all of them. (Especially band where we have chairs right next to each other.) Speaking of band I'm new in the class, so if i ask for help on a note she'll be like "SHUT UP I DON'T KNOW!" It just hurts. She is never herself anymore. One day I was really upset and some of my other friends talked about it with me. They agreed she was starting to act stuck up and uncaring. Even one of her friends from kinder garden. So I talked to my parents and there just like "Get ready for her to change, sorry." But, I can't just let her go. I used to call her my best friend. I just don't know what to do. :[ I've tried talking to her about it and she?s just says "You have to know I?m just a sarcastic person like that." or she'll just get really mad and yell. She gets mad a lot.

So I really don't know what to do. Help?

( Nice helpfull questions, please. :] )


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NickK

Posts: 1

How do I handle my friend and how shes acting?

« Reply #1 on: October 22, 2008, 11:19:54 AM »

just play it by ear

don't say something that might provoke her

if you need help

ask someone else

she might just be going through an adolescent phase right now

hormones make girls do some really crazy things

if things get worse however

you need to think of number one and you might have to dump her

friends come and go and when you finally realize that

it hurts


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crazymama

Posts: 1

How do I handle my friend and how shes acting?

« Reply #2 on: October 23, 2008, 06:11:09 AM »

simply just tell her in a nice way not to treat you like that... and tell her that you've already bought ur holloween costume..so there's no point in changing it..and it wasnt your intentions... and when you dont understand anything in class..just ask your teacher directly... maybe she dont kno 4 real.. and even when she's not the way she use to be ..well then just leave her alone... meet some other new ppl and leave her aside... she need time and space to tell her she's acting like a real bad person!


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MimiS

Posts: 1

How do I handle my friend and how shes acting?

« Reply #3 on: October 24, 2008, 01:02:24 AM »

She doesn't respect you. I know what that's like. I have this "friend" who is a complete b*tch (Will you answer my question about her? http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Aq2Zx1KA1EYjN7kc.50kl5Lsy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20081023173440AAHVK5H )

You have to get her to respect you more. You have to let her know it's not okay to make fun of you. The person I mentioned above is passive-aggressive. (Well, she used to be. Now since I've taken her crap she's just aggressive.) Your friend sounds passive-aggressive too.What you have to do with the passive-aggressive is make them feel uncomfortable with making fun of you. Give them a weird looks after they make fun of you, they'll probably rush to say "Just kidding." If giving them weird looks doesn't work, challenge them until they back down. Call her names if she insults you. She'll get sick of it and stop making fun of you.

Or she'll avoid you...but maybe that might be good for you. I had this other friend, (different from the one I mentioned above) who used to be my friend. Right before she started avoiding me, she started treating me like that. Now she hangs out with different people and is a different person. I'm okay with that. Our split was harsh, but now I don't get annoyed when I hear her name. She's just one of those people I don't talk to, and I'm glad. The person she is now is not someone I would want to hang out with.


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mssexy

Posts: 1

How do I handle my friend and how shes acting?

« Reply #4 on: October 24, 2008, 07:53:39 PM »

well since you don't want to leave her reverse it and make her leave you for instance act the same way she acts giver a taste of her own medicine


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MimiM

Posts: 1

How do I handle my friend and how shes acting?

« Reply #5 on: October 25, 2008, 02:44:54 PM »

Well, if she is your friend and is hurting you, you should really talk to her, next time she does something to you like that you need to tell how you feel about her rude statements. and if she was your friend she would care and understand. And you dont have to loose her as a friend, but it may be better if you meet other people cause she may need alot of changing. And if you meet new friends, you will always have people to have back on if she does something so low.

Good luck!


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PrincessK

Posts: 1

How do I handle my friend and how shes acting?

« Reply #6 on: October 26, 2008, 09:36:09 AM »

Sometimes friends grown apart and they change sometimes for the better or not. I know its hard but you going to have to let her go as a friend but before you do let her know you will always be there for her if she need you but right now you can't be a friend. Good Luck


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Kimmy3

Posts: 1

How do I handle my friend and how shes acting?

« Reply #7 on: October 27, 2008, 04:27:24 AM »

Your experiencing the whole maturing and growing apart thing and what you are feeling is totally normal. You will likely experience this a lot more as you grow older. Chances are she is hitting puberty and her hormones are just all over the place. Yours will be soon, so get ready. Its a wild ride.

People do get older and more mature, and they can either grow closer together or grow farther apart. Do not be surprised if you two grow apart since points of view will change, opinions will change, interests will change. A whole lot more changes too, but it may be for the better that you two grow apart for any number of reasons. She has her set of goals and you have yours, now. They will likely be different in a few years and that may take you in different directions. Its all a part of life and the only choice you have is to adjust and deal with it. Sucks, I know.

Set some boundaries for her with yourself and start enforcing them with both her and your friend. The next time they mess with you, dont play their game. Once they see that your tired of it, they will stop it. They only do it to see you get upset. You just have to show that your the bigger person and dont play immature games, but your actions speak louder than words. Stop asking her help and ask someone else. Make other friends and hang out with them before class instead of her. Show that you dont have to rely on her.

Good luck and hope this helps.


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